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"Razors pain you;
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And drugs cause cramp.
Guns aren't lawful;
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You might as well live."
-Dorothy Parker-



4.16.2004
[11:36 PM]

Best E-mail Scam Ever

Got This In The Ol' Email Today:


Dear XXXXX, (It had my last name, which I'm removing)

I am barrister Mark Anthony. A solicitor at law, I am the personal attorney
to Mr. Larry XXXXX. A foreigner to my country, who used to work with Oil
Refinery Company in Nigeria. My client, Mr. Larry, his wife and their three
children were involved in a car Accident along SHAGAMU express road in which
all occupants of the motor died.

My Client {LARRY} deposited the sum of $8 Million United State Dollars with
a finance company for himself, with the hope of transferring it to his country
as soon as he is on leave. Since his death I have made several enquiries
to locate any of my clients extended relatives this has also proved unsuccessful.


After these several unsuccessful attempts, I decided to trace his last name
over the Internet, to locate any member of his family hence I contacted
you. I contacted you to assist in repatriating the money and property left
behind by my client before they get confiscated or declared unserviceable
by the Finance Company where this huge deposit were lodged. Particularly,
the finance company where the deceased had an deposit valued at about $8
Million United State Dollars has issued me a notice to provide the Next
of Kin or have his deposited Fund confiscated within the next ten official
working days.

Since i have been unsuccessful in locating the relatives for over 2 years
now I seek your consent to present you as the Next of Kin of the deceased
since you have the same last name so that the proceeds of this Account valued
at $8 Million United State Dollars can be transfer to you as the Next of
Kin to my late client.

All necessary legal documents that can be used to back up any claim we may
make will be obtain accordingly. All I require is your honest cooperation
to enable us seeing this deal through. I guarantee that this will be executed
under a legitimate arrangement that will protect you from any breach of
the law. On conclusion of this transaction, I will travel to meet with you
for a business partnership with your advice.

Please get in touch with me by my alternative email: markassociate@consultant.com
also forward your full names and address, Your private telephone and fax
number, upon the receipt of your response i will advice you on how to contact
the Bank directly before the fund gets confiscated.

Best regards,

Mark Anthony.
Mark Anthony & Associate
Direct Line: 234-803-3321055


Isn't that just great? I can make $8,000,000 just by having the right last name? sweet! I mean, sweet if it wasn't just a total fraud, which it is. But what a great scam. Whatever the scam is. It's just great. Wonderful, really. Stupendous. I could make $8,000,000. yeah. Like the IRS isn't going to look very closely at any documents that give a guy like me that much money. The IRS is going to go "oh you have the same last name, well that's good enough, right?"

Especially as it is an Italian name. Which means the guy (mythical though he is) would likely have relatives all over the place, who, unless he was a major fucking outcast, would happily claim him as kin. Italians keep in touch.

And LARRY? who'd give a guy named LARRY 8 million dollars? I don't know of a single Larry in my family tree.
It's just a bad name. This entire thing stinks.

oh well, another day, another scam email.



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